Monday, March 31, 2008

Shadow Songs

Music Theory is finished.
I had my last Business Policy test this morning (for which I typed 40 pages of study notes).
I'm wearing a skirt and tennis-shoes today.
Holly comes back in 17 days.
Last night, the roommates and I enjoyed leftover pizza, fruit salad, and popcorn for dinner.
Currently, my favorite movie is "August Rush."
I plan to spend the afternoon writing an HR paper on recruitment, selection, and appraisal.
Charity knocked over my flowers again. :)
Amy and I caught up on life last night.
Still waiting on job information.

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I have seen You in Your sanctuary and gazed upon Your power and glory. Your unfailing love is better than life itself; how I praise You! I will praise You as long as I live, lifting up my hands to You in prayer. You satisfy me more than the richest feast. I will praise You with songs of joy. I lie awake thinking of You, meditating on You through the night. Because You are my helper, I sing for joy in the shadow of Your wings. I cling to You; Your strong right hand holds me securely. (Psalm 63, NLT)

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Life is unrelenting. Doubts are real.
Yet, my Jesus is perfectly faithful. And perfect love banishes fear.
So I sing songs of joy in the shadow of His wings.
Shadow songs. My heart's cry.
For more of Jesus.
For more of His love in my life.
For more glory to be given to the Father.
Shadow songs. In spite of life. In awe of Jesus.
Because He is perfectly worthy.
Amen--let it be so.

Jana

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

"Sloshing" Thoughts

I've been composing an entry in my head for a few days. But, this morning my thoughts are all random:

My favorite "holiday" of the year already came and went: Good Friday and Easter weekend. Every year I am filled with sorrowful joy . . . celebrating His death and His resurrection. Every year I intentionally take time to meditate and remember and worship. This year, I was reminded anew of His incredibly gracious sacrifice.

No classes for me today. That is certainly a blessing.

My weekend at home was not relaxing but fun nonetheless. Highlights: Talking to Jessica while drinking coffee. Spending time with Mom in a coffee shop while we both did homework. Going to a Good Friday service. Eating breakfast with Dad. Laughing a lot at Alex's party (and spending time with Jason, Chris, and Alex). Going to church on Sunday morning! Time with the family and the Miller family on Sunday afternoon.

I survived a full day of interviews on Monday. It was exhausting but I made it. I was extremely nervous and worried about it on Friday. Then I decided that I needed to snap out of it. God has my job situation all under control . . . as usual.

At times my heart is overwhelmed with fear--so many thoughts sloshing around. God is good all the time . . . but I so easily give in to hopelessness. This morning I was encouraged as I meditated on His freeing sacrifice and the truth of His presence. "The Lord is near. Do not be anxious . . ."

I admit it: I am an introvert. Therefore, time alone to "recharge" is necessary. Yesterday I took a two hour nap, got stuck in a novel for 1 1/2 hours, and watching "American Idol" while I wrote letters. (Yes--I got stuck in a book. It happens to me. I start reading and then . . . bam . . . I look up and 2 hours have passed. It's a very dangerous habit.)

Enough rambling.
The main thing is to keep the main thing as the main thing.
And the main thing is Jesus.
Jana Alexis

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Beautiful Truth

Class happenings. Well. Not much to report. Just plugging along. Trying to learn and not simply to get the desired grade. I have much to reshape in this area of performance and approval. Please pray I would truly grasp His teaching and be able to change. I want to change.

RA happenings. I meet with my RD for our 1-on-1 every week and we meet as an RA team once a week. It is more comfortable with the girls now. I rode to church with Rachel this morning; I sure enjoy the time I spend with her. We lead the Insiders study together--which is going well, by the way. We only have two chapters left.

Friend happenings. I sure enjoyed my time with Charity this week. Let's see. Monday we ate lunch together and laughed during Financial Peace class. Tuesday we watched "American Idol." Thursday we made drop biscuits after Shekinah Glory because we were craving them--warm biscuits with butter and honey. Friday we went to the Jazz Coffeehouse concert and enjoyed our free hot chocolate. Yesterday we studied in the library from 2-7:30pm. Today we watched "Enchanted" at the Dollar Theater. What a blessing she is to me!

Job happenings. It's kind of slowed down right now. Please pray for wisdom and strength to continue the process.

Don't you just love it when a portion of Scripture jumps off the page at you? Begging to be considered and enjoyed and digested? Hebrews 9-12 did that to me on Friday morning. I asked God to open my heart . . . and He answered my prayer 10 minutes later. It was amazing!

". . . by one sacrifice He has made perfect forever those who are being made holy." Heb. 10:14
After reading this verse, I realized: Jesus made me perfect through His sacrifice; there is nothing I can even attempt to do for my own salvation. And now He is in the process ("being made") of making me holy, more like Himself.

Ah. Beautiful truth.
Jana Alexis

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Praise Jesus

Praise Jesus: I had such a wonderful Spring Break. You wouldn't believe all that I can cram into one week: Visit from Amy. Drive to visit Jason. Visit Millers. Ice skating and Starbucks with the girls. Homework. Skype with Holly. Two interviews. Paint my room with Dad. Hair appointment (don't worry--just a trim). Dinners with the family. Visit with Cindi DeSomer and her children (good friend who I haven't seen in 8 years!). Visit with my Great Grandma Mann (who is 98).

Praise Jesus: I had a dentist appointment last week. For the first time in exactly one year, I did not need to have my mouth piece adjusted. Perhaps my jaw is finally stabilizing!!! I was so happy. My dentist gave me a high-five.

Praise Jesus: I came back to school refreshed and ready to finish the last six weeks strong. I decided that I'm not going to simply survive; I'm going to live.

Praise Jesus: I got a bad grade on two speeches . . . but I'm okay with it. I did not beat myself up. I'll learn from this and move on. Grades are not my life.

Praise Jesus: My Semester Abroad Office boss returns from China on Friday. Next week will be my last to work in the office. I'm ready to be free of that responsibility.

Praise Jesus!
Jana Alexis

PS: Do you have a tune that always plays in your head? I often find myself humming one from "Seven Brides for Seven Brothers." It annoyed one of my teammates in Australia--she couldn't stand it. I feel semi-bad for the rest of you who have to be around me a lot. :)

Saturday, March 8, 2008

I said; She said.

I turned down the bed heater from 10 to 2.
Sister turned it up to 4.
She said, "Why do you turn it down so far every night?"
I said, "The heat makes me feel sick."
She said, "I'm cold."
I said, "Put on a long-sleeve and some socks."
She said, "Take off your socks."
She said, "I can't sleep with socks on."
I was too tired to answer.
And then we fell asleep.

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Dad and I are currently painting my new bedroom a lovely taupe. And we're listening to oldies: Anointed, Sonic Flood, Raze. Good stuff. I love decorating and painting and colors and interior design. I've decided that's going to be my midlife-crisis career switch.

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Thou art coming to a King,
Large petitions with thee bring,
For His grace and power are such
None can ever ask too much.

(John Newton)

Monday, March 3, 2008

Being Lazy

I love being lazy. It's 11:15am and I still haven't showered and done my hair.

I love being at home.

I love the talks that Amy and I are having. I love this time with her.

I do have homework to do this week but I love not feeling the same kind of pressure.

I love spending time with my girl friends: Jessica, Charity, Alex, Nichole, Sarah, and Erin . . . You girls are so fun. I love to laugh with you.

And did I mention yet that I like times when I can be lazy?

Thank you, Jesus.
That's all.
Jans